I got otter pops to cool the beers, it's an all around better idea.
I fukin lobve the states. Girls here let me fuck them because they like my accent. I may not go back
Best idea ever: Giving hobos a beer and having a chugging contest to win another beer. Most fun I have had downtown in a while.
Somehow I don't trust you in this state to talk to you about a colonoscopy
And i didn't ask you to do that, You showed your penis at your own free will.
Three questions... How drunk were you? How long until we can make fun of you for this? Do you even really need a spleen?
sorry can't make it tonight, greg's getting back from italy. he's had two weeks of carbs and no gym; now's my chance to get myself a piece of that newly-fat, low self-esteemed ass.
Just walked out of 7 11 still in uniform when 4 girls in bikinis in a convertable screamed "we fuck firefighters!"
Career choice validated
It was like the perfect storm of bad decisions.
next photo in the 'cherished memories' series- Jess's bed. Note the vomit actually UNDER the pillows. shes a genius.
It was an "I snuck in through the window at 5am with my underwear in my pocket" kind of night.
How can I politely yet provocatively ask you for a cock shot?
I still can't believe that I ate McDonald's off of my chest in his bed...
Cross faded me is not the classiest.
No not at all haha I wish there was a picture of that
How's the hangover?
I've been begging my dog to mercy kill me for over an hour. He has this look like he might do it, you know, as my best friend should.
I know he's only a bandaid for my emotional disrepair, but he can stick me anytime!!
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