can we please move this conversation out of my vagina?
She solidified the fact that the icon from Wendy's is the only ginger I care for
Your never gonna wash that desperation outta that sweatshirt you know.
On campus. Grown men in women's sexy bee costumes. Complete with legwarmers. This cannot be real life.
I have just disproved the common belief that it is impossible to have mediocre sex in a fire truck.
The fire in my vagina flames on. Fucking terrible firefighter
All three of them were helicoptering their dicks to persuade me to take my thong off
Facebook stalking ex-girlfriends who went to rehab. This is my life.
The fact that there are multiple ex-girlfriends who have been to rehab concerns me
No. Mother. Fucking. Jello shots. Just no. I'm not falling into that trap again.
Things were easy when he was just a penis. Now he's a penis with feelings.
Dude best one night stand i woke she was cleaning our fridge while waiting for the cab to show
I cnant read. Cheetos goen. Help. Grt Cheetos.
Because drinking and showering don't go hand in hand. There that's my PSA of the day.
Its honestly only a matter of time before I punch him in the face... I'll try to control myself until you guys break up
If you find my integrity anywhere, please tell it to come back home
Maybe life is about finding the person you DO want to cuddle with after they rail you like a porn star
Randomize
