So you're telling me it's impossible to have a "slight case" of chlamydia?
i just heard Winston Churchill in auto-tune. thank you nerds.
Oh come on. There's no way I was the only female choir student taking shots in the back room.
Don't worry. This time I'll get black out drunk so they'll just think it's an American thing.
I want to break up with him.....but he has a george forman grill...like I need that
I didn't hate myself when I woke up today, that's improvement right?
Just had a random flashback of you tickling some guy's nipple with your claw ring, and then him moaning and stripping in the middle of the bar. You give good memories.
i just want to attach a dildo to the ceiling and ride it like a gay spiderman.
Note to self: do not ride giant beanbag chair down stairs.
Apparently getting a blow job in the mens room from the bar owners daughter will get you kicked out.
You are hereby uninvited from future Turnt Tuesdays until further notice.
he asked if he should bring the trash can into the room.. apparently i shoved my finger all over his face and said.. shhhh dont talk... just take your pants off.
Just saw the pics from the bachelor party. When the hell did we go to southie. And why was there a chicken in the limo..? You guys really are my best friends.
The night took a wrong turn after I found you smoking a blunt with a midget behind the bar...
I just discovered my new vice. Cotton candy vodka. Its like a carnival in my mouth, puking of the tilt-a-whirl included.
Randomize
