You would DIE at the bar we're at right now. All indian/asian med students, I swear
Asian doctor ratio. So hot. I would've gone into heat
he broke up with me so i peed in his bed
If I see one more duchette wearing Ed Hardy, but not actually having a real tattoo. I swear Im gonna shank a bitch.
i was just outside smoking and i saw a hooker sing "i wish i knew who your daddy was" to her new born baby. someone explain to me why i ever left chicago to go to college...
hahah your definitly as dumb as I think I thought you are. boom roasted.
you know what its like when everyone is chanting "do it, do it"...still friends?
I just realized last night I drunk-bought a flight to Florida for this weekend...kinda torn between the price and the potential of awesomeness
I can't be drunk. Sober yes. Drunk no. Spoonfuls
you kind of just crawled on top of him. that was the point at which i became concerned with how drunk you were.
Like. I probably should fuck him. I owe him for breaking his thumb.
If my sophomore year were to be made into a novel, it would be titled "dances with salvia"
You slapped my ass and yelled "HOOTY TOOTY WHAT A BOOTY" in a Schwarzenegger voice
You passed out in your dogs bed and you only willingly woke up because I told there was a bottle of vodka and a snickers bar waiting for you upstairs
The dentist walked in on me trying to bottle some laughing gas to take home with me. That high.
She threw her burger out the car window last night. My vegan neighbors were not pleased but I’m pretty sure I saw a for sale sign go up on their lawn so I owe her one.
Randomize
