I don't smoke a lot but now and then I do. Weed and I are like still standing naked in a bathroom together deciding if we should blow one another or bolt for the exit. An awkward relationship.
what is college for if not random hookup sex?
learning.
i would literally fuck learning if i could.
I bought the love spell lotion from victoria secret so it atleast smells like a girl is present while I'm masturbating
Also, did that cop draw hearts on everyone's hands last night?
You were hugging the toilet and shouting "don't let fatty eat me" through the closed door.
She's a virgin AND a minister's daughter. We're one schoolgirl outfit from the dear penthouse trifecta
HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO LOOK FUCKABLE IN AN ALL NEON SPANDEX JUMPSUIT?
It was like watching porn, except it was in real life, and it was starring two of your best friends.
You kno how some people just need a "everything will be alright" pat on the back? I need an "everything will be alright" blowjob right now. Come over
I cannot FaceTime with your penis
It's like you know you got fucjed up when you wake up and check fir your own pulse
Didn't shower and drew a couple dicks on my face before I went to work. Boss sent me home. Sacrificed my dignity for a 3 day weekend with you guys.
At this point it's more of an experiment to see how much actual bush growth is possible. See, being single can be both educational and surprisingly comfy!
Concept: I never actually flirt with anyone, I'm just a bitch and some people find it endearing
she brought her phone charger to the bar this bitch is ready to drink
Randomize