Her name starts with A and ends with whore.
Brandon just fucked that chick! I tried to warn him but T9 said she had "puppy roses" instead of "pussy sores"
Smoked a bowl on a rollercoaster. Literally ON. Beat that.
I wish you could order shots online.
Just saw a white stretch Hummer limo outside of CiCi's pizza. Way to live up to the stereotypes, Alabama.
I'm in the dining hall. that same guy is here again, the one who sits alone and talks to his silverware.
Ur just texting me random shit. That's what Twitter is for
I found out that they tried to reenact the Snooki drop by using a jump rope and the banister. Pictures say it all.
There's a big hole in the wall at the dining hall. I hope we didn't do
All I wanted was a quiet evening to masturbate and eat cake and instead you ruined it by bringing girls over.
Would it be tacky of me to tell the two girls I just found out he's been sleeping with on the side that I've been having gay sex with him all semester?
I may or may not have just ruined a marriage. But in my defense I got all my drinks for free tonight.
Would I waste your time for mediocre porn?
Got back to find Sarah in her underwear eating peanut butter and watching Arrested Development with the thermostat at eighty.
facebook is just a cold reminder of all the times other bitches won my hookups
Randomize
