okay I'm thinking he doens't have a facebook...I'm on page 28 of Hunters
ok you need to stop NOW
i dont know if you remember blowing your vomity nose directly into my hand...yeah thanks for that
Did you push me into the oil wrestling or did I elect to do it?
You said you wanted to do it, but I gave you a friendly nudge.
...that's why he's not doing anything with his life except breeding geckos
Sex tent. say it aloud its amazing. promise you we rnt stoned.
Wine floats aren't as good of an idea as they seem
nothin like your phone freezing up and sending out old booty calls at 11am on a sunday. fml.
this celing is unfamiliar to me... im just vaguely wondering where i am. but not quite concerned enough to do anything about it.
Well I accidentally flashed a 76 year old woman, i'm in a house full of republicans and Im almost drunk enough to give the gay rights speech so i'd say this wedding reception is going great
Drove by a guy getting road head, midday on O Street. That could be us, but you won't let me in your pants when you drive.
So now I can cross "have my ass be someone's phone background" off the bucket list. You know, if it was something I actually had wanted to happen.
Do him. As soon as possible and as often as possible. That's what Oprah would say
I woke up and finished the bottle like a champ
Just got back from a Walmart run. The music went straight from Kid Rock to John Phillip Souza. If that doesn't scream 'MURICA I don't know what will. Happy 4th!
Anyway, that's been my evening- crying and looking up diabetes symptoms. How was your night?
Randomize
