Now I have to picture Dave Letterman having sex with all these women. Im the real victim.
yes, the chronicles of narnia is exactly what happens when you do crack inside of a wardrobe.
You going to midnight mass? we need a dd
How do u explain cocaine to a 9 year old?
so...he totally just used scissors to cut up the weed. a wet paper towel to moisten the blunt....and a blow dryer so it wouldn't be wet. this dude either has the worst case of OCD or has the potential to be the next martha stewart.
how do I tell him nicely and in french that we can't have sex anymore because his huge penis will ruin me for other french men?
She was doing lines off of her friends boobs in the limo at 9 oclock on a thursday This has the potential to be the best weekend ever
Just pure bliss will emerge from Charles, my tranny bong.
His daughter is our waitress. I left her a ten dollar 'I'm sorry I'm a whore and fucked your dad' tip...
Eye surgery went well. Just can't believe it took getting lasers through my eyes to temporarily stop the vivid sex dreams I was having
I have a rash on my arm from the cat litter. Think the cat will be mad that I peed in its box?
Holy sore nipples Batman
my brother has friends over and I can hear one of them screaming from the basement "BREATHE. FILL YOUR LUNGS. LIVE YOUR LIFE." and it sounds like he's doing some motivational speaking down there but that's actually just how he encourages ppl to take bong hits
Don't tell me you're on acid again
is it fun? or sober?
Randomize
