Is it 'vaginas' or 'vaginae?'. Either way there were a shit ton of them.
i make out with random ppl when i drink he shouldnt feel special
i find it simply astounding you spelled drunken wrong but pterodactyl right
So after the reception we snuck back into the church for drunken hook up. we passed out there and woke up in time for 6am mass still dressed from the wedding. spiritually trashy or classy?
He woke up, got my bottle of water and poured it on me and then went back to sleep. Not really how I want to wake up at 2 a.m.
I found ecstasy taped in my armpit... thank you drunk Marissa.
He was all like, "I've prayed every single day just for one more night with you."
Omg just give him a quick handy and walk out.
HOLD ONTO YOUR PANTIES AND SAY GOODBYE TO THE REMAINDER OF YOUR INTEGRITY
I traded him cumming in my face for a year for a Disney annual pass. One giant leap back for feminism, one small step for the adult child Disney fan.
IDK I WAS CAUGHT UP IN THE TEQUILA SHOTS AND FRIENDSHIP
He showed up to a booty call with 2 tea bags, but no condom...
Yeah because the only thing stopping you from fucking Emma Watson is you not being a Gryffindor
I ditched my one night stand in the hotel lobby. How did he add me on Snapchat?
HE CHOSE A RESTAURANT AND MADE A FUCKING RESERVATION. I AM SHOOK
What does it mean when the bartender gives you 4 straws?
Randomize
