Proposition. Sex. No words, no talking about it later. I just want you tonight.
we just decided that lesbian tuesdays are a must, as of tomorrow.
The sun is out and the snow is finally starting to melt here... Vodka bottles keep popping up everywhere. Guess it's the college version of burying nuts for the winter
My vagina has officially become a vortex for sexually confused frat guys.
I cannot believe how calm you were last night about telling Katie she was on fire.
I turn the corner to find her walking in the front door in a tee-shirt, two different shoes and no pants. All she said to me was "I'm sad"
HAPPY NEWYEARSM FAGTRON! GETTING HEAD IN TAXI I WIN
She handed me her tooth and asked me to hold it so she could swim.
I just dropped $300 on lingerie. He better rip this off with his teeth.
He specifically said I couldn't post the picture of him passed out naked except for a strategically placed washcloth. Where's the fun in that?
YOU'RE MARRIED. TO OTHER PEOPLE.
Drunk sperm are not productive sperm.
When the vodka monkeys are playing a drum solo in my skull tomorrow, remind me I tried to sterilize my body from the inside with titos
congratulations on joining the accidental bisexual club
A sultry night of tacos and sex sounds nice. Should I bring home milk?
I just hit 3 trees and a golf cart.. all on the same hole
Put me down for a bogey
Randomize
