Its ok relax. i can tell ur gonna start raggin. talk 2 u next week
yeh she's definitely getting a ham and plan b omelette in the morning
I just got a 45 minute blow job...she literally sucked the single life outta me.
u sound so gay right now
Alone. In an inflatable pool. Drinking vodka and raspberry lemonade. I don't need approval as much as I need to know you love me still.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
at what point did you think saran wrap was a better alternative to shoes?
Still trying to wash and scratch the glitter off of my dick. That stripper should be banned.
It's a bathroom floor kind of morning.
He's talking about how great of a find these dollar store condoms were. Help.
I managed to make myself a bowl of apple jacks, took one bite and had to stop eating them because they were making my brain wiggle. How was your comedown?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Most senic walk of shame ever. This is why you go to school in Hawaii.
So when I eventually, if ever, find someone I'd like to marry, do you think having people fly to africa for a lion king themed wedding is too much?
Jesus I should have learned from my first marriage not to get married again
"She's seriously grinding on him while whispering into his ear, 'take me to McDonald's.'"
I just want to drink bourbon and have sex and then eat like, a Christmas cookie.
Hey remind me the get the pancakes out of my jacket
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