There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
Tall, dark & handsome can suck my short, pale & awkward dick.
he just tried to lick my eyebrow. thats the deal breaker.
I love drunk self when he leaves a prepacked bong for the morning... in the bathroom.
There is something depressing about eating toast in a dark living room by myself using a paper plate that says: "Let's Party!"
I need to stop taking drags of other peoples cigarettes, it's such a tease. Like playing just the tip, you just can't
Let's make a pact to never get in a cab at 3am together unless it's to go home or for pizza.
then my gynecologist said "its like opening up buried treasure"
i stole nothing, broke nothing, and stabbed nothing. aren't you proud of me?
I'm high and reading a Wikipedia article on circumcision procedure. Help.
I've never said "lesbians" so many times in a short response answer
*jedi mind trick* you want to go down on me
6 hours ago I jacked off a a guy for $100. I explained it away as "compensation" for gas and tolls. WHAT am I doing with my life? Quickest and easiest $100 I ever made though, haha
I forgot that I'm high because of how high I am.
If you think me talking about that hot guy accepting my LinkedIn request is pornographic, I’m not sure how you’re gonna feel when I tell you I fucked a stranger on a park bench last weekend
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