Wow, you were right... Weed does start conversations
would you kill someone to have someone deliver pancakes to you when you were high?
Its so akward after he cums on my face. like usually the porn just ends
I just used an app to identify a song that was playing in the background of a porno. May god bless your soul steve jobs.
This dude is being a total douche
Just because it's Christmas Eve does not mean the liquor store has to give you a free bottle of peppermint schnapps
i saw the poster for your lost tequila... what a shame
I'm pretty sure I have a cold now from having sex on the hood of my car in the rain. Worth it? Absolutely.
I know. I know. The man who pulled me from my mother's womb was the same man who had his fingers in my vagina today. My life is a joke. I don't know how to feel about this.
I'm currently looking through google images of circumsized penises and realizing how vital pre-marital sex is.
It took me half an hour to realize I didnt know them
According to facebook, I opened up a can of whupass on some douche who poured all the vodka on the ground.
You called the wrong number but I salute you.
Is "head down ass up" an appropriate way to say good morning?
Was having relations of the behind variety with my girlfriend. Based on where we were at I could see myself in the bathroom mirror. You know I did the Patrick Bateman point and wink at the mirror and turned on sissudio by Phil Collins.
I'M SORRY THIS WAS SEXTING AND I MADE IT SERIOUS.
He went down on me for an hour and a half. He needs to get promoted more often.
Randomize