It is 3am. I'm at a pizzeria with my 4 friends. The one to my right is throwing up on herself, the one to my left is crying hysterically by herself, the one in front of me is passed out on the table, and the other is trying to find a taxi and I'm pretty sure a guy is sticking his hand up her skirt. Tourists are taking pictures. Help me.
I think she's a little more wasted than usual. She just crawled on the floor to tell mom it was time to take a shot.
My god. We'll be gay porn millionaires.
they were fucking between cars in the parking lot and everyone was cheering at them.
One minute we were getting noise complainted by the security guards the next I was shotgunning a beer with them
If I EVER think it's a good idea to blow someone who just showed me their synchronized swimming performance on youtube again please correct me immediately.
I'm glad we are bonding over both contracting clamidya. Winners.
100%
Watching him is like watching a star slowly implode
Don't get me wrong, the sex itself is amazing, but I don't think I will EVER get used to her habit of singing lines Jesus christ super star when she is about to cum.
Def just threw up beer then brushed my teeth with some randos toothpaste now back to drinkin beer
I am the girl who goes to bed with her make-up on so that she doesn't have to fully redo it in the morning. I am obviously not ready to be a mother.
How does that even work?
Bro you fell face first into the sand and then balled up into the fetal position and yelled help untill I picked you up, no more whiskey for you...
Well, at some point in her life every girl has to decide how much weird she's willing to tolerate for hot tall banker cock
GUESS WHOSE BEST FRIEND IS OUT OF PRISON!
He's eating a sriracha ravioli sandwich. How do you think the night is going?
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