she cant drink. allergic to alcohol.
ewwww. she might as well have a dick.
Some man just said he would jack off to my hair color.
She needs to learn she only fits into our friendship as a DD.
Woke up with the note 'going outside. Ignore bloody spoon. Be back soon' taped to my forehead. Know anything about it?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I elbow dropped a bag of ice to break it so we could make margaritas. I bled everywhere. Be proud.
Well this lady at the bar told me I was a natural on the tambourine and that it was my God given talent. and then she gave me a tambourine.
Pants-less sunday? Also I'm high and independence day is making me cry
im coming over
There is a really great story behind the missing Coco Puffs and vodka mystery
apparently domino's not only has a live feed of pizzas coming out of the oven, but it also has a built in smooth jazz radio station. this pizza's getting really pornographic really fast.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Its like I've been given a sexual blank check.
Anyway. I unfriended all of these people like a grown up and I am never talking to them again
Well she just asked a sorority girl if she should fuck her floor mate so it's basically like the blind leading the blind
I think the sex rug burn on my back is infected, can you check it out when you get home?
we just smoked for like ten hours and got froyo. not a bad start to the weekend.
I don't think you understand I turned down McDonalds for you.
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