i spent my evening searching "the sims having sex" on youtube
we're no longer friends
you know when i was in school the girls definitely did not have the tits the 15 year olds have now. so unfair.
So i literally just wrote sorry on my quiz and turned it in.
She was drinking straight whiskey out of her peacock shaped vase again.
5am, I am wayy too drunk for this. Hookers came out of nowhere. They're like ninjas. Some poor soul got the fat one, tomorrow's going to be interesting...
Honestly I will go to church for him, I will even try to quit smoking for him. But his dick is not worth losing alcohol. He sure as fuck isn't taking away our wine nights.
either i huffed spraypaint or ate out that makeup artist. you decide.
Wait do you remember that guy last night asking to use my nose ring to open his beer.......
Let's try finding a bar where there aren't people who want to hang me from a tree by my nutsack
once he tried to wake me up from my hangover nap to have sex, that's when things went downhill. he had to go.
My professor just asked for my number. Not fucking her till after finals though I learned my lesson last time.
My vagina cried when he left. I think she's about to be at war with my self respect.
I'm literally trapped as the little spoon on a mattress on the floor of an unfinished basement with a professional athlete snoring in my hair
I wish drug dealers had sales for the holidays
I have dined. Now I want to get fucked.
Randomize
