would you ever date a girl who drove an 89 Chrysler LeBaron? - for the record it's a convertable
I took off my clothes and she wanted to have sex. But then she changed her mind. So we ended up fucking through her panties or something. I don't know it was weird.
My mom make sausages for dinner...and all I could think of was your dog's penis..
considering i was high when my dad made me pee in the cup i might fail this one
i got us a cheese tray and a bottle of whiskey
ugh yes i love our date nights
Woah there. I lasted a semester and a fourth of college not having sex. trust me when i say keeping my virginity was an obstacle course of olympic proportions.
The virgin olympics. I would win the gold. For America.
foreskin is a definite game changer
I'm high. Everything has a 45° angle. That is as far as my eyes open
THE PRUIS IN YOUR DRIVEWAY IS NOT YOURS
excuse me?
I accidentally borrowed your spare keys a while ago...i just tried them...that, my friend, is not your car.
there are no losers in shot checkers. only winners.
Dougie got over his pride nerves. Found him dancing on a float wearing nothing but rainbow boxers.
Cocaine and dance dance revolution for 4 hours. I consider last night a success.
Video footage says last night I reincarnated as stripper Shania Twain... Man, I feel like a (slutty) woman.
Last night was a whirlwind of vodka - induced emotion
I'm glad I date someone who likes the simple things. Sex, kittens, and McDonald's.
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