I think I kinda wanna bone that ginger from Harry Potter.
You literally just made my flesh crawl.
Dude, 1 prime defect in the snuggie- you can't fuck someone discreetly under a snuggie. No way no how
Fell asleep in bio again. Sometimes i feel like college is just one really expensive nap.
you kept yelling at her to "show me your genitals" until the bouncers told us to leave...at which point you showed them YOUR genitals...
please don't ever take me to a strip club again...
So add panera bread to the places i love to eat that i am potentially banned from.
Literally just spent 45 minutes converting my paintball gun to shoot condoms....
Monday morning margarita madness at ny house. Yes before wheel of fortune. Yes day drinking.
Take off that red sweater and wear my vagina as a facemask.
I was short on money so I let my roommate mase me for $60
Successfully masturbated while balancing on an exercise ball. my greatest accomplishment?
Probably
Its a first. Never been peed on in a line to concert. First time for everything.
She kept telling me it was a squirtgun.
He also gave me two gold stars for sex. On my nipples.
It's the best! If I had one wish it would be for life to be one really long gay porno. Thats what I wish for during every 11:11.
I wish I had a picture of me and ron helping that stripper lick her own vagina
Places I vomited today: hotel bathroom, in the cab to the airport, airport bathroom, airport terminal trashcan, plane seat 18E, and the plans bathroom
Fun wedding?
Yes. Very.
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