Its about time the women of america have a president they can masturbate to again
i think im in love. he told me he doesnt care if i shave down there.
I'm not saying I want a booty call. I just want what Cory and Topanga had.
I just puked in the mop bucket at work. I think I need to go home.
You going to midnight mass? we need a dd
i'm ready for this baby to gtfo so i can get coked out.
i left the icescrapper in his bathroom. i dont remember taking it there, but i remember brushing his hair with it.
This is a rough morning for me
No, rough is puking in your froyo cup next to a five year old and her grandma.
he used the hotel microwave to cook the 16" pizza he bought at the walmart deli
He used a "food city great value" card to cut it
Well, if you're getting/have gotten your dick sucked, you're welcome. If not, I tried. Step up your game, pussy. I pulled a MacGuyver and got mine. No excuses bro.
Directions to your booty call: go down the part of Route 66 that has all the car dealerships, motels and bad decisions, go past the Christian college and turn left at the Children's Center.
I smell like lime and condoms and I really want a waffle. Fuk
He left for work so I drank pickle juice from his fridge
I feel like I should acknowledge that I see you as a human and not a ragdoll sex object
He made me cum 3 times, then immediately after sex packed a bowl and passed it to me. Yeah.. I'll keep him.
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