windsor, ontario is like a poor man's amsterdam
no, it is just poor
it went kinda like vodka, childhood memories, screaming/cursing, fist fight, tears, broken shit, passing out. in that order. tis the season.
You are colorful like whore, yet adorable, like sad puppy. You need more drink.
I think I'm on the verge of a really slutty period in my life
YOU RECOMMENDED ME TO THIS GIRL BECAUSE SHES A STRIPPER AND YOU KNOW MY WEAKNESS FOR STRIPPERS WITH CHILDREN.
you are my patron saint of "too drunk for 9am". i just keep asking myself what would alyssa do as i try to regain motor function
I found a lucrative side business - giving rides home to drunk oil executives. Very profitable.
Thanks be to the Goddess of Whores!! I straightened my bed before Ken got here. Found Calvin's boxers in the sheets!!!!
cops woke me up on the sidewalk and asked where my shoes are.. fuck if i know, im sleeping on the sidewalk! actually i didnt say that, i just cried until they gave me a ride home.
Im in my back seat in my own drive way with two beers left to shotgun and watching the sunrise. Am I over her yet?
Finally hooked up with her. She bought me tacos after because "she can do better in a bed". You're gonna be my best man.
Not sure what time I'll be home. I'm currently topless and the damn stripper won't give me my clothes back
Just remember: We don't tell our English professor about our fetishes unless she specifically asks about them.
I know you're having some issues right now but can we focus on the gangbang?
Sorry I can't pick up... thought process is fine but too stoned to form words.
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