it's not gay if you rub your penis between their butt cheeks and pretend they are tits
Its where this guy sticks a jar up his ass. Be prepared to be suspended between vomiting and cheering.
Your last words were "i'm gonna motorboat the bartender." then you commenced with an attempted motorboat
You had me sold at "fucking you down the slide"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Last thing I remember is Dusty riding the bikes we "borrowed" from the hotel through the CVS while the rest of us picked up the girls who were laughing at him
It took him an hour to realize I wasn't this "Sarah" girl, and by then he was already crying and eating pizza rolls.
I hope it's socially acceptable to wear a mesh one piece into last call tonight?
Gonna be hard to top last New Year's Eve when the guy I blew came at midnight
So high, just applauded for a magic trick on Hulu.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
CAPS.LOCK.AND.SPACEBAR.ARE.BROKEN.
Vacuum the place before you go out of town there are random glitter cocks everywhere
I never thought my gollum impression would lead to me getting laid.
Huzzah!
just realized we fucked to the ultimate disney playlist last night. hakuna matata.
when I said eat the rich I didn't mean like that but here we are sucking that capitalist dick
I just sent a Slack that autocorrected tomorrow to gonorrhoea. Please note that Slack autocorrect isn’t very good.
Randomize