oh no, I think we did it in the 'front asshole'
Oral text is very safe with the right protection.
I'm going to kill the bastard that switches my hot hookups from the previous night with ugly chicks
It's like you don't even want to get drunk with me everyday, anymore.
Good cause the way I see it, we are down to DAYS left of college so we should have as much naked fun as possible. And Jenga really facilitates that.
everytime someone would look at you, you started to try and deep throat your beer bottle.
Fell down a spiral staircase. Et tu vodka. Et tu.
im sorry for trying to flush a roll of toilet paper down with my puke. probably not great for your toilet
I just had to explain to my 62 year old advisor what "tea-bagging" was in the middle of her lecture. I smell extra credit. And maybe a demonstration.
Apparently, "please don't I have to be in court tomorrow" is not a valid excuse for a girl to abstain from giving a massive hickey.
You can't just leave with hair like that
Most desperate stoner moment; dropped our hard earned resin ball in the sand, rinsed it off and then did knife hits in the kitchen cuz we broke our only pipe
I heard a crunch while giving him head. I looked up and he was eating Cheese Itz. So we made a deal that he'd take a hand job so I could eat them too.
just had an allergic reaction to my dildo. My life is ruined.
I threw up in 4 different Starbucks across the city before 9 am.
Randomize
