It was just pointed out to me in a meeting that there is a lipstick stain on my crotch.
Every time we go downtown I ask myself why we live in Des Moines
It's not littering; it's giving birds nest building suplies. Besides, birds love soy sauce and plastic forks.
Buying beer for freshmen. No matter what they ask for, I'm getting them Colt 45.
These 19 Guys Hit The Cougar Jackpot
we had sex three times last night.. but now im just wet from him crying on my stomach about how much he misses his ex.. awesome
So we are lighting beer bottles on fire and breaking them in half to make glasses
That sounds dangerous
Don't worry......were wearing oven mits.
Dude, I had to masturbate just to stay warm. Please pay the gas bill?
The last thing i remember is saying breakfast beer and carrying the keg to my room and locking the door.
She is ok w me having sex for money. Just gotta find rich grandmas.
35 Disappointing People Who Failed At Sexting
in line at jewel. the cashier is puking in a garbage can while ringing up customers. glad to know im not the only one that 2012 is kicking in the face already.
This american gymnastics guy.... He just messed up. I feel so bad. I just wanna hug him until he stops crying. Not even in a sexual way. I just wanna hug him.
What made this night legendary was getting pulled over for looking suspicious while wearing an iron man mask
Was considering going to moonshine but I think I'm just gonna stay home and drink beer because there is no law against partial nudity here.
A guy claiming to be the Japanese counterpart to the White Power Ranger is trying to take me home....
So apparently dinosaur erotica does, in fact, exist.