Peanut Butter and turkey sandwich...this may come back to haunt me
hey my socially awkward cousin is our designated driver for summer, we just have to put up with her wierd shit.
You came into my room at 3am.. drunk.. and asked to do spanish homework together. Props for being a good student.
Just woke up with three stitches in my left boob. Nevertheless, I think I'm going to like this school.
Can we please not be like these pathetic people in their thirties who only get drunk when they go see Sherrill Crow?
I kinda remember trying to staple rolls of toilet paper to make a pillow, but it's blank after that.
I've never seen a homeless man jog to get off the bus and then run to his panhandling spot because he's "late for work," but you see something new every day.
Feeling better?
I can stand long enough to do the dishes finally. Been trying that all day.
On a scale of 1-10 how seriously are we considering being sugar babies?
I'm about a 7.95
It was all going fine until I had to chug that strawberita bud light. That really ended badly.
Hopefully this dress says "let me rent your house" and not "let me suck your dick for money"
I just remembered that we had an in-depth conversation about how it was too stressful to wear pants.
You should know two things about me,,,1) I am highly sexual and 2) I am HIGHLY competitive so you telling me about how much sex you had with the other girl makes me say "challenge accepted"... you should hydrate.
He was leaving the restaurant I was going to as I was parking. I didn't want to scream, "hey, didn't I jerk you off?" Out of my window at 10 am
I noticed while having sex on Friday that I have great endurance. CrossFit works.
Randomize
