too bad you can't see the clap by looking at her face.
she is a standing ovation.
She said she never had to courage to go fully shaved. Since when did shaving your snatch become courageous?
omg. if hes just gonna get mad everytime i have sex with one of his "friends" then it was never gonna work out
I just found pie in my hoodie pocket... This break needs to end.
I was really excited when he said that condoms didn't fit him, then he added "they fall right off"...
yeah people on the adjacent balcony, Im naked drinking outside in 0 degree weather at 1pm. got a problem?
Why the hell did you smack that girls beer out of her hand at the end of the night then buy her a double jack and coke for?
Its called bad cop laid cop.
You installed a beer holder in the shower?! You're the best roommate ever!
... That's a shower caddy.
I believe this is a toe-mate-toe vs. toe-maut-toe situation.
This late night dumpster diving sesh is making my quads cramp up
I want to name my colorful bowl Batman. Why? I still have yet to figure it out. But I'm calling it Batman.
Heard you were the one that shit off Jamie's balcony. FYI there is a cabbie down here out for blood
I really want some funfetti cake but I feel like its more socially acceptable to go out and drink
Damn you. I'm in a bar with Southern Jesus Fearing Blah Blah Rednecks WHO ARE PROBABLY VOTING FOR TRUMP and you go radio silent.
Quick, I need a picture of your dick. Don't ask questions, just show me your genitals.
His acid is intense dude. I was just over at his place laughing about the hole in the wall I was convinced was a cat
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