I can't believe he cheated
Whatever. Anytime she has an orgasm, it's because I taught him how
I told him I was pregnant. Figured it would soften the blow of telling him I had herpes.
Did it?
Not as such, no.
Spider just rapelled from her vag rethinking online dating.
Went home with a guy 2 " his house". Woke up this morn on couch to parents cooking breakfast, piss all over my back and he is no where to be found. That fuckr pissed on me and bounced. His parents are gonna think some drunk bitch pissed their couch.
So how do we make 4/20 better than every other day we are stoned?
I definitely recall eating shredded cheese out of the bag while you were wearing that apron.
this is not okay. even my mom refers to me as a sorostitute.
He wasn't eating out, he was performing a hysterectomy without a license....should I be worried about my future family?
Ahahhahaha I'm not that stupid but then again I thought cabo was in Africa until yesterday
That unicorn pillow pet really made sleeping with my head in the toilet a little better.
Seriously, though. As long as it's attached to you and is not a vagina, I will not be disappointed.
You called it motorboating but you just snot rocketed into my tits.
Can you send me a picture of your dog? I might need to borrow him so I can wear a speedo to a pool party on Friday
Are you awake? I feel like I need to confess my sins to someone not on this side of the country.
I think about him when I masturbate so I guess you could call it love
Randomize
