do you believe in love at first sight?
awwwwww =)
yea.. so can i have your sisters number? thanks!
Y do pigs give u trufles on farmville? I WANT BACON YOU FUCKING PIG!
She tried to keep her legs crossed last night while doing a keg stand. Way to keep it classy.
I was so high last night that i'm 89% sure my roommates set up an obstacle course for me and timed it. Not positive.. I think one of the challenges was pairing shoes
The biggest loser is alot easier to jack off to at the end of the season
i wish i could shrink down to the size of his dick so i could just thank it in person.
mom in a round about way told me to either donate my eggs or become a surrogate bcuz I need money.
high in an attic. pig roast in 10.
Goats are brash and offensive and cocky animals
Are you high and at a petting zoo again?
We found you in the middle of the road chucking gravel because "the house was too far away".
All I know is that I'm not gonna send out SOS messages via twitter for your rescue this time.
The spirit of America is being too hungover to celebrate America right?
I tipped him really well because I feel he knew we were high, but did it in a non judgemental way.
I shit you not. Dude complemented me for being meme savvy. You could drown a toddler in my panties right now.
Your boobs are like a folk legend.
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