You want to go to a white party at LAX
Clubs are lame especially themed ones. Im not in a fucking episode of laguna beach
This is how I know I have no life... Jon and Kate are my emotional roller coaster.
So I'm eating my sandwich... and a penny fell out of it.
Fuck Spring. The birds chirping at 4am make me feel unnatural for still being up and drunk.
He filled our room with little plastic cups of beer so the only way I could get out was by drinking them all.
we were walking and you spelled the word "oats" to prove you weren't drunk.
Finished the final in under ten minutes and then puked in the bushes outside. I don't even care if I graduate anymore.
Theres a live mouse in the toilet. Goddamn you this is why I don't party here
I knew we would be good together when you made me lick jameson off your boob while you screamed along with racks on racks
Omg I'm puking right now and then sneezed four times in a row. You don't know pain til this happens to you.
Just saw a midget on an elliptical. Epic.
I can't tell if I'm still on the hangover from last night, or if I'm experiencing the one from tomorrow, because it was so powerful that it actually traveled back through time...
After we won that round of beer pong you attempted to swallow the winning ball whole claiming you had the mouth and jaw of a snake.
A snake? I must've been gone...
After that you got naked and hissed at people the rest of the night..
I am playing in the snow in my bunny outfit. GET OVER HERE
Maybe for you. You don't have to clean the melted butter off the stove. I LOST THE SPECIAL SEASONINGS.
Randomize
