What you up to?
Having coffee. Getting eyefucked. Eyefucking.
Full throttle
Some guys are relationship guys. Not our niche.
some old guy just shit himself in my section. everyones leaving
Get condoms and clear your schedule for the night. I'm bringing chinese food!
Note to self: never go down on a girl first thing in the morning…its like opening a grilled cheese sandwich
"Hung over, tired and having a faint scent of some body butter and random pieces of glitter from a girl named gigi, almost arrested in drug bust, $40 Canadian in my pocket and all i got was this lousy Tshirt" shirts dont exist, but they need to
No no no no no. Not interrested. She looks just like Kim's fat booth picture. Only real.
All I learned from that experience was that drinking scotch out of a crunk goblet was bad news.
On monday, while we were having crazy monkey sex, I earned $82. Vacation pay rocks.
I think I just sold a snake to a stoned teenager.
Well if I'm going to hook up with every ethnicity by the end of undergrad, I need to be moving on
Girl at work pointed out that the blood vessels around my eyes were all popped and I smell like puke
Told some guy to hold your weave while you "tried" to kick his girlfriends ass...
Sorry, I was watching the Olympic story about the Canadian guy and drinking out of the prescription bottle and crying because it was so beautiful.
I fucked him while wearing his hat. I love the navy
3 cups of coffee and some molly. The "Tay's Day Off Diet"
Randomize
