So its not gay if you have sex with another woman and its academic
so what if I'm having sex with a woman for recreation?
Thats gay
oh posh. I need a real boy. To fill my void. This guy has potential. He is a Republican.
***** and i were talking about Republicans today. They are usually the champs of mediocrity but we decided mediocrity is underrated.
The waiter to-go cupped my bloody mary without me even asking. THAT hungover.
I swear if his heart was half the size of the cum stains he's left on my sheets we would have the perfect relationship
He must be back home now. He moved his box of beer from her porch to ours.
Had a speaker in class today. She asked whats the first question when you see someone pregnant. I said whos the father? She was looking for "is it a boy or a girl?"
Well I'm 2 for 2 with the absinthe, I just woke up in some random car behind the bar
I think I've had 45 beers today though So things are looking up.
I'm happily sitting on the toilet cause I'm too tired to move. I'm considering making this my permanent residence. It has a lot to offer.
Is it too early to start pregaming for St. Patty's?
He's unconstrained by sanity, physics, or his liver.
He played Harry Potter Fan Fiction videos to get me in the mood. He might be the one.
he woke up this morning, drunk as fuck, butt ass naked, and he had left grandmas gun on the counter and doesn't know why.
So I said "fuck it" and made myself a sandwich
I woke up with a giant paw print on the side of my face, my jaw hurts, and I have no idea how any of this happened.
Randomize
