Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(319): View more from Iowa

Sponge bath it is.

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(319): Sponge bath it is. http://tfl.nu/r4q1

Replies (2) Good night (1000) Bad night (491)
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(317): View more from Indiana

Thanks again for letting me crash last nite. Sorry I banged your little brother.

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(317): Thanks again for letting me crash last nite. Sorry I banged your little brother. http://tfl.nu/z8j5

Replies (28) Good night (1732) Bad night (654)
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(830): View more from Texas

I've decided through careful research we can out drink any country folk.

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(830): I've decided through careful research we can out drink any country folk. http://tfl.nu/s9wt

Replies (33) Good night (948) Bad night (484)
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(954): View more from Florida

Dude WTF? His teammate just started talkin to me on fb! Am I walking around with a "I like to f**k gators" on my forehead?

(787): View more from Puerto Rico

No, it just says ur easy

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(954): Dude WTF? His teammate just started talkin to me on fb! Am I walking around with a "I like to f**k gators" on my forehead? (787): No, it just says ur easy http://tfl.nu/6cbn

Replies (22) Good night (1031) Bad night (1656)
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(416): View more from Ontario

She STILL went home with me even when I said yes when she asked if I had an infectious disease. Turns out she asked if I had an infectious spirit...well she has my infectious spirit now

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(416): She STILL went home with me even when I said yes when she asked if I had an infectious disease. Turns out she asked if I had an infectious spirit...well she has my infectious spirit now http://tfl.nu/59pg

Replies (64) Good night (1111) Bad night (6731)
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(708): View more from Illinois

You were so drunk last night you typed www.face.come/cheese.com as if you were logging into facebook.

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(708): You were so drunk last night you typed www.face.come/cheese.com as if you were logging into facebook. http://tfl.nu/mlr4

Replies (24) Good night (4382) Bad night (772)
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(480): View more from Arizona

A-plus on my thesis. I deserve the blowjob to end all blowjobs. And I wanna wear a crown while you do it.

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(480): A-plus on my thesis. I deserve the blowjob to end all blowjobs. And I wanna wear a crown while you do it. http://tfl.nu/wob5

Replies (11) Good night (8404) Bad night (1008)
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(256): View more from Alabama

I just dropped macaroni right down my cleavage. For the sake of our future, I'm really banking on this being a turn on for you.

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(256): I just dropped macaroni right down my cleavage. For the sake of our future, I'm really banking on this being a turn on for you. http://tfl.nu/8mod

Replies (12) Good night (3720) Bad night (1113)
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(410): View more from Maryland

The cop told me to answer for everyone if there was drinking involved and then i threw up in my Luigi's italian ice that i was eating with a pizza slicer

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(410): The cop told me to answer for everyone if there was drinking involved and then i threw up in my Luigi's italian ice that i was eating with a pizza slicer http://tfl.nu/0sxh

Replies (5) Good night (1516) Bad night (983)
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(201): View more from New Jersey

Oh my god, I am the best RA ever. I'm teaching my freshman girls how to deep throat on bananas as a group bonding activity. I'm making the religious ones eat them for potassium.

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(201): Oh my god, I am the best RA ever. I'm teaching my freshman girls how to deep throat on bananas as a group bonding activity. I'm making the religious ones eat them for potassium. http://tfl.nu/lfpo

Replies (11) Good night (4653) Bad night (742)
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(770): View more from Georgia

If I'm not up by 8, will you please knock on my door?

(910): View more from North Carolina

That depends, can you stop texting me while you're masturbating?

(770): View more from Georgia

Touche.

(910): View more from North Carolina

I CAN STILL HEAR YOUR VIBRATOR.

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(770): If I'm not up by 8, will you please knock on my door? (910): That depends, can you stop texting me while you're masturbating? (770): Touche. (910): I CAN STILL HEAR YOUR VIBRATOR. http://tfl.nu/rwye

Replies (6) Good night (3954) Bad night (838)
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(503): View more from Oregon

I showed that dick picture that your date texted you to everyone because you passed out and left your phone unattended. Your fault. Plus his cock was big so his fault too.

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(503): I showed that dick picture that your date texted you to everyone because you passed out and left your phone unattended. Your fault. Plus his cock was big so his fault too. http://tfl.nu/alyx

Replies (5) Good night (2311) Bad night (576)
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(317): View more from Indiana

He said female orgasms are a myth and refuses to even try to give me one.

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(317): He said female orgasms are a myth and refuses to even try to give me one. http://tfl.nu/b8h5

Replies (27) Good night (882) Bad night (6732)
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(410): View more from Maryland

I feel like a cloud. A cloud that wants to be laid.

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(410): I feel like a cloud. A cloud that wants to be laid. http://tfl.nu/ggrs

Replies (4) Good night (1254) Bad night (413)
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(928): View more from Arizona

It isn't possible and the very mindfuck of that concept gives me a lady boner.

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(928): It isn't possible and the very mindfuck of that concept gives me a lady boner. http://tfl.nu/2dny

Replies (6) Good night (1097) Bad night (419)

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