ad ew i am wasted whats my problem
so my mom told me to suck on something if I have to cough. so I guess blow jobs are ok
lets start a swedish sibling band together
You broke a window with your face. I don't think the landlord will be as impressed as we were.
We went to his house and he brought a jar of pickles to bed. I think im in love.
She had a baby and now works at Hooters. She is the poster child for peaking in high school.
Been in the ER for 3 hours now. This hospitals transition to paperless is not going well. But my doctor looks like Elton John and just gave me percocet
well its a long story but basically i overcame many cockblocks
You grinded and hooked up with a middle aged tiger woods look-a-like with manboobs. Tequila isn't for you.
Maybe you can hide out somewhere she would never go. Like a counseling center or AA
Apparently nick called me at 3 in the morning looking for you because you ate your keys and ran away..do I need to call an ambulance.
Can't feel body but making pizza rolls
i now understand why vodka
Watching the series finale of Friends and crying in my Thai food. I don't like hangover Jared.
I hope you know, that by sending me a cat meme back, you've entered in a cat picture battle; which never has an end in sight.
The duel has begun.
Randomize
