her vagine was all disorganized.
it's like everything I expected to see tonight all put together in one at once
that is the greatest description ever
I woke up to 'call me' written in red lipstick on my chest. Thats the hottest/sluttiest thing ever. I win at LIFE!
I usually would've stopped there but I kinda remember opening the bottle of vodka, and we ALL know that's when things go downhill.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He just called me juicy booty via text message.
I just helped a group of highschool stoners find a safe place to smoke I feel like a responsible rolemodel
thanks for the bloody nose. you probably dont remember, i'm not mad.. only because your boobs are to blame
nothing says roomie bonding better than a sunday shroom trip.
She rode an inflatable shark down the stairs. Viva shark week.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now Heβs Upset Because People Told His Mom
in the future when you find clothing in your street, just assume it's mine.
I'm sitting here bra-less eating jalepeno candied bacon. You know you want this.
Coming.
I could see myself being this awkward weirdo drunk girl that patted strangers and danced terribly but was powerless to stop it
Your heart isn't making stupid decisions... your penis is outsmarting your brain. Stop fucking her!
Good news!! I can adult!! π turning down the strip club on a weeknight has become my crowning achievement ππ
I just got a rock from a customer. Weirdest. Tip. Ever.
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