Anddd after the worst sex of my life, he said.."do you mind taking off the condom, tying it up, and throwing it at the door?" Weird.
there should be laws that require people like to me to be on birth control.
hypothetically speaking is slutty or smart to buy plan b before we go on spring break so i dont have to get it in mexico
What a dumb baby whore.
They have 12 kegs and 40 bottles of liquor and a pool with a diving board. And hardly anyone at this wedding knows me. Should be a great night
Hot Italian guy literally came into my logic class just to get my number to study with me and left. America.
Is it inappropriate to be Drs. Willy Fister and Jess Hewill as a couples costume for Halloween?
Oh we're gynecologists
Call me and get me out of this conversation NOW. My coworker is talking to me about her birds having sex again...
"Fuck all you guys I'm going to be Cameltoe Spider-Man for Halloween."
I vote we just hike, drink, and destroy dick
You do realize he's just an extension of his penis, right?
i just watched a 27 minute video about owls...that high.
JB just got pulled over and I am in the trunk...... this isnt good
She's kind of holyer-than-thou, like god himself came down and said "please cock block your roommate at every opportunity, and if you think she's thinking of sex, tell her she's a whore"
You said you made a new recipe, but it turned out you just cooked ramen with vodka instead of water.
Randomize
