we dont do blackfin have a good night :)
he kept refering to his penis as the "eternal sunshine"
Sundays have taken on a whole new meaning when I'm not in bed with an excruciating hangover.
Fairly certain I called dibs on your lesbian virginity last night
when you wake up try not to move. we are betting to see if more sprinkles stuck to you or the pong table.
bad sex. bad bad bad. it was like trying to pick up an overcooked noodle with an empty pringles can. why do these guys always seem to find me?
I just listened to "Eye of the Tiger" and did 5 shots to prep going over to see him.
Do you know of any good hiding spots in the Atlanta area?
I'd apply for another job, but "staring out windows crying" is not a hot qualification right now.
Oh okay. That's fine. I'll buy us both dinner when you bail me out
It's a post jail date
Who suggested the eggnog wet t-shirt contest last night like whose idea was that
Speaking
I was looking at the storm clouds during my run and one oddly resembled ur penis
I woke up with a hangover and a man bun. Reached over to drink water and accidentally chugged raspberry vodka. So there's that.
One less thong to worry about.
One less *thing! But probably that too.
Eating breakfast at 1:30 in the afternoon stark naked is how everyone should live
Randomize
