i'm pissing behind 7/11. if you guys leave... i'll think it's funny too
I woke up on the side of the highway to the ppl in orange jumpsuits cleaning to comunity service. Not sure which freaked them out more... Finding a dead b ody or me not being dead
He's been dead since March and more people write on his wall than mine.
He stole her cigarettes and walked 15 miles just so he wouldn't have to wake up next to her. God I love being a lesbian.
I do. There's a bald headed guy whose kinda hot. I might rub his head. I've only had 2 beers
I'm not embarrassed about the lap dance. I'm embarrassed for the singing during.
Um I think everyone drunk and there's some douche on violin.
2nd fun fact: he has a square tan line around his dick.
He was uncircumcised
It was like inception. A penis within a penis within a penis
Ended up getting hot boxed in a limo with a bunch of asians going to a karaoke bar. I think I pretended to understand their language for a solid hour. Am I bilingual now?
You were throwing cups at people in the basement, yelling at them to get out of your swamp.
Do I get bonus points if I get lockjaw after a cosmic blowjob?
i tried to break up pigeon sex because one looked too young to consent. fireball feminism ftw
Tell him to put up or shut up. Can't be dangling dick in front of ho's without delivering.
It's just disrespectful
i now regret my decision on turning down your offer of sex in the backseat
Randomize
