Don't come here someone got drunk and rolled the keg to buger king. no more beeer
I have a new fascination with cutting really small segments of hair off peoples heads when they're not looking.
Sunburnt clitoris. How do I deal with it.
Just topless shotgunned a bud light alone. I am about to peer mentor the shit out of these freshmen.
He let me keep his flannel as a "good job" for the great head I gave him.
So when you said you wanted to make a clay replica of my boobs and hang it above your bed you actually meant it?
I have Retrograde Ejaculation as a side effect from one of my meds. Is this a respectable form of birth control?
He kicked in the door just as I climbed on top of him...and stood there. I felt like I was in a porn. It was invigorating.
We don't watch enough power rangers
this dude, we had a connection. he kept smiling at me. it's like he knew i was gonna facebook stalk the fuck out of him
I have a LOT of reasons to worry about radical feminists taking my lady balls, frankly. A lot.
HE'S LICKING FROSTING OFF OF THE EIGHTEEN YEAR OLD BOY
i'm 99% sure they had an orgy while i was passed out
Yeah I knew you'd like him. He's emotionally and physically self destructive.
We would have so much to talk about!
I got really worried when i woke up and there weren't any missed booty calls from him between 3 and 5 am. Apparently his gf is in town ...
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