im orety awesome arent i? relly i know i am
i was shrooming and she was sobbing. i was trying to be sympathetic, but i could see the veins working like worms under her skin. and then her face stripped down to the muscle.
what was she crying about?
i wanna say it was the lack of skin on her face but maybe she lost her job.
even in my darkest moments, having another person eat my jizz would make me smile
I'm sorry i'm just too high to handle anything besides pirates of the caribbean right now.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
thanks 4 putting "im not your boyfriend baby" on my sex playlist. she just got pissed and left.
I'm driving to work with an ice pack on my vagina. how was your weekend?
Remember that foreign guy who never talked last night? He just came out of my bathroom when I woke up.
The interviewer had a hook for his right hand I TRIED TO SHAKE HIS HOOK WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME
Finished sriting an apology letter to my liver 2 weeks before st. Patricks game on
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How much morphine is too much? Keep in mind that I'm going to my graduation dinner with my parents.
How am I so hungover that wearing sunglasses hurts my head?
I wish there was a morning after pill for dominoes.
I made him laugh his dick is mine
You had sex with a kid to spare him the shame of being a virgin. Evidence is on my side.
All I remember was my mom walking through the door, and then me asking her if she wanted a hit.
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