Yup u can hook up with me now and not goto jail
Grinding on my ninth grade teacher. Dreams really do come true
For those pictures, I will suffer this headache.
apparently, i ordered a pogo stick last night. i can't even be mad about that.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i lost virginity while listening to candy shop. something in my life has finally gone right.
She is a social worker. An actual good person trying to save the world. I feel like every time I give her an orgasm God wipes a little smudge off of my shit list.
they were fucking between cars in the parking lot and everyone was cheering at them.
the question is "speedos?" and the answer is "yes".
Currently cooking 3lbs of bacon in case the power goes out bc if even one slice of bacon goes to waste then sandy wins
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Your stoned with a 2 year old in the room....and that makes you want to have babies?!
I'm terrified that I'm going to have a baby with a guy who posts snapchat stories while ignoring my texts
I wish you could see all the crumbs in my bra....it looks like Hansel & Gretel got lost in my cleavage.
I like to listen to classical music when I eat taco bell. I think it cancels out the aura of poverty and desperation.
I tired using vodka to remove my makeup
Turns out naked yoga wasn't a pickup line. I feel betrayed.
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