but what if he tries to talk dirty to me with the lisp?
his cum tasted like old pizza and looked like old milk
sometimes i think life is slapping me across the face and laughing, saying "ha ha! you're an adult!"
Please find an outlet that isn't stripping or getting drunk and arrested
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
czant get you from the arport. sry i found the rum. dan sucks at rumpong jusrt so yo knoqw.
New wedding record, my shirt was off by 8pm!!!
in the future when you find clothing in your street, just assume it's mine.
I played "in the air tonight" on a drum set made of titties, and I'm not even exaggerating
No I did not just post a Craigslist ad for a used stripper pole because I can't afford my own. But now that you put the idea in my head I might have to.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was 100% done.. I used my vibrator while eating cold pizza. Shit was magical.
Had to snap chat three different people to ask who left the bite mark on my thigh. All three said "Wasn't me". Now I can't wear a bathing suit to my mom's pool.
I swear she is the Mary Poppins of drugs
Nah it's alright, I'll just ride cock all the way to hell
Because you touch yourself at night.
...What time of day am I supposed to do it?
Puking out the window is really hard when you're the one driving.
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