if you call bong hits and onion rings a party, then yeah
I woke up on the stairs at of a Disneyland hotel. Yes, my night was amazing.
We're friends with people in his circle of friends so we're half way in. It's like I've already given him a hand job.
Don't blame the cocaine for your eating disorder.
i pretended i was deaf and got a girl to come home with me
let's just pour the lemonade mix into the soco. cut out the middle man.
Your girlfriend is in jail- I've just never been able to use that in a sentence before. Thank you both!
You're asking your pregnant booty call to go to a funeral with you?
Itd be nice if there was a level of interest in me somewhere in between the indifference and obsession that I've only been attracting
Like if it it's practical for your sexual health I'm allergic to it AKA REGULAR CONDOMS
I still don't know his name but his ass is spectacular. Like he should never wear pants.
As of right now, my vibrator and a bag of snickers share the same drawer
The lady at the liquor store in my hometown just gave ran around the corner and gave me a hug when I came back from being gone for a couple months. My life is complete.
I want to find him again. His Corona tank top and I were made for each other.
he would NOT stop making out with my stomach! creeeeeepy
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