We walk out of his house and his dad is there, so I had to meet him and shake his hand pretending that same hand hadn't been down his son's pants five minutes earlier
16 and pregnant actually makes me really happy that i'm gay
i just googled the alphabet. i couldnt remember if it was jklomnop or jklmnop.
whatever it's my dick and i'll put it wherever i want
We are so drunk I just let him piss between my legs on the toilet. That's love.
Well, I woke up with a text message from my cab driver that said "I hope you're alive," so that's a good indicator of how I was acting last night.
getting kicked in the face by someone doing a keg stand. just my luck
I left two hundred in singles in your car sorry about the mess
Never ever ever ever ever ever give your number to a 30 year old at buffalo wild wings. Ever ever ever.
i’m not very adjusted to having free time. for example, I forgot how much fun it is to masturbate.
Thanks for taking care of me. I hope I didn't pee in your car.
I'm going to teach Troy such valuable life lessons. Yesterday I told him to stay away from girls who drink redbull and vodkas.
It has now been 10 days since we last saw Sebastians penis
u better not lose ur virginity to a sugar daddy who doesn’t post a pic of himself to tinder
Not to be hella graphic on main but I just came so hard I think I saw a new color.
Randomize
