I blew a .224 after sleeping for 6 hrs, cleary im a champion
Sorry about teling your dad i'd have sex with him last night in front of your mom while i was drunk
i don't have fun when you have fun. i have embarrassment, fear, and significantly less cash in my wallet.
dude 8 am is too early to start pregaming for new years eve
clearly you are not from wisconsin
that last vodka shot was definitely the straw that broke the camels alcohol tolerance level
Could someone please kill snooki before she contributes to the gene pool.
She woke up with blood running down her face and asked the EMS guy where the keg was
I think I just got a contact from my own exhale. Def dying.
Instead of sending me a picture of his dick, he sent me a drawing of it on drawsomething. This game is getting out of control.
U offered to motor boat her and it somehow turned into u two going on a sunset cruise in Newport. At 3am.
I came home to him frying bacon to put in his beer. He said bacon beer lights, taste the awesomer rockies
I'm going back to his house to watch wreck it Ralp.
Hey, Monsters Inc. got me laid. Disney man, who knew it leads to sex.
I feel like my sexual preferences are just another sign that I am a 75 year old drag queen in a 29 year old woman's body.
there was a goddamn geisha at house. my dick feels more cultured.
You had a good week dude, you bought a motorcycle and a beer bong with ur parents money, missed 2 classes, and ran from security twice, good first 2 days to college
Randomize
