everytime someone famous vagina shows up in pics, i have to go check my own vagina to make sure mine dont look all wrinkledy and flabby like that....i want my lips plump and succulent
You probably shouldn't be hiding under someones bed listening to them get head
he was in the bathroom singing "will it floooaaat?? will it floooaaat?!" turns out that's a deal breaker for me.
So shortly after drunk sex...she starts crying and saying..." you don't care about me, you never do anything nice for me" so I called her a cab
We just took the batteries out of the fire alarm to play the breathalyzer game. I love college.
Can you still call it a wet dream if sandwiches were involved?
I just had to download an app to edit pictures on my new phone. The things I do for sexting...
We didn't have sex but he is somehow naked and laying on top of me. his dick is touching my leg and freaking me the fuck out.
Woke up w/ the same freshman as last Saturday but we were sober this time. Is that a relationship?
the only thing you said was do the helicopter dick
And literally 4loko margaritas are callin my name. They're like "Hey girl come on over here I'll make you forget about grades and boys and it'll be a good idea to send everyone 55 snapchats of your cleavage" ok
And my nipple is sore from him biting it. That is not a complaint.
Instead of asking him how many women he's slept with I just got straight to the point and asked how many Plan B pills he's purchased
You haven't lived until you have fucked while Fantasia is on
You would critique a dick pic. Damn art people.
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