i just went dwnstairs and there are 5 guys without their shirts on hugging each other. i think i should leave now
yea, there's something about a stripper whipping you with your own belt that makes you think
He said he wanted to make me his Twinkie, "filled with his delicious cream." ABSOLUTELY 100% NO YOU MAY NOT REPEAT ****NOT**** GIVE HIM MY NUMBER EVER EVER EVER. Please confirm receipt and full comprehension of this message.
Definitely worth waiting her kid to got to sleep when the first thing you hear once she's back is "I want you in my ass right now"
It's not an office Christmas party until your boss confesses his undying love for your boyfriend...
okay - we take $20 and buy each other some 'drink till we puke' clothes from the thrift store.
Cool. Some 22 year old kids gave me a ride home from the bar last night. In related news, I made out with a 22yr old last night. He was adorable
If we're single and alone together, the fuck angels shall sing upon our nude bodies.
Beer, water, beer, water, beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer so much beer
Some nice lady just gave me a beer out of her purse. I love youth hockey
No seriously you guys are gonna get arrested
Do me a favor I want you to reach down the front of your pants and underwear and just feel around for a while... if you happen to find your balls then join us
I'm turning into an adult here.
Adults touch each other's special zones.
Those thigh tattoos deserve the handsomest of grins between them. Dont settle.
He does impressions. Handy knowing you can get fucked by one guy and pretend a group of celebrities is running a train on you.
I’M DRUNK AND EXCITED.
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