why are there post-it notes all around the apartment labeled where you guys had sex and in what position
we turned studying into a drinking game, she drinks when she gets it right, i drink when she gets it wrong. so we'll be out soon
Wow anytime a scalper has i need tix written on the back of a franzia box thats a trusted seller
I wouldn't really call it 'getting lucky' considering I paid her to do it.
I banged her roommate when she was gone. She came back with a chicken sandwich and a bj. Then she said " smells like my roommates vagina" I think I can get a threesome tonight
If you didn't damage your room so much from fucking so hard we would have got more of our security deposit back
I resent that
I'm really not interested in hearing from him. Unless there is casual sex involved
Do you think she will like "you don't have to swallow this time" gift certificates for Xmas?
You turned byob into bring your own shit show. Good work.
I miss you more than I would miss junk food if I went on a diet. And you've seen me eat, you know how desperate I'd be.
I told him I wanted to "ride him like a show pony" I think he gets the picture
pray to the hookup gods
So my new thing apparently is getting wasted, showing people my slytherin socks and convincing them I'm slytherin..because why not
I woke up handcuffed to a bed wearing nothing but an army belt. Does this count as thanking our country?
got cock blocked by the cops again. two of the cops were the same ones from that t bell incident and they recognized me... they still dont like me
Randomize
