Don't forget I'm 20 now
I liked you more when you were 19
And then he said "I can't get blown while Gordon Bombay and Mr. Holland stare at me from the TV"
I would pay so much money for a video of you fucking a sheep
The crowing achievement of my life is still the time I made a 3 course meal out of things I found in the dumpster.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Oh no I would never do that to her. But when you're single again let me know. Cheating penis is definitely better than single penis. But she has claws.
VAGINAS ASSEMBLE!
I'm not seeing this movie with you.
I literally just fucked insane clown pussy. 24 yo nut job moonlights at children's parties. Gave me head while still in full clown makeup from my kid's birthday party.
Probably twitter. Never underestimate a psycho girl with wifi
Super stoned right now. And I stared at my exit, thought to myself "hey self. That is your exit" and I kept driving right past it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Come to office depot with me I need help picking out a daily planner that will help me keep all of my casual sex dates organized.
There comes a point, as I lay on the floor of the work disabled toilets contemplating catching 10 minutes sleep between chunders, that I wonder if its really worth it
Me: 10% human, 90% poor drunken life choices.
Should I be worried if two ants just crawled out of my purse?
Yes!
He asked if I could not say his name during sex cause he liked the girl in the apartment above me.
i dont know how or why im in the gym right now, but theres a hot cop, a guy i hook up with, and his hot friend. this can only lead to every fantasy i ever had.
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