This is clearly one of those "A hole's a hole" situations
Haha im Trying. This detox stuff tastes nasty. It's bad when the only thing that came to mind when i took the first sip was how good it would be with Vodka
It may be that your sole purpose in life is simply to serve as a warning to others..
I feel like college is just an experience in what names I can't name my future son.
My Valentine's Day plans just drastically changed... My F buddy just ran into my gf...in my driveway.
My text message history should be ashamed of itself right now.
This chick had a condom box organized by size with dividers that glowed in the dark.
Note to self: if you decide to go to the gym when you're coming down from your day high to shoot some hoops, do NOT play pickup basketball with the big black dudes who need a sixth
I asked him to make me two boxes of macaroni and cheese. That's like eight servings. How did I think that was an okay amount.
Nothing to be ashamed of. I bet Oprah has sharted.
We're friends with benifits... The benifits being I'm fucking her boyfriend
Good, I've got all this booze. It's intimidating to be in the room alone with it..
You need a new phone. When you talk it sounds like the teacher from Peanuts while she's trying to give a blowjob.
Honestly, I am sitting in my room watching Ciara videos and thinking I am super jealous of how she rides it.
Somehow, walking in on your drunk mom in a diaper was the least traumatic thing I saw last night
Randomize
