The guy I fucked in the port a poty just called me and asked me on a date!
Awkward!
No he was cute and I said yes!
that's just what I need...drunk ass people throwin hatchets in the dark.
ok watching intervention on tv. when i hit rock bottom - i wanna be THIS chick.
he doesn't care that i have a boyfriend so why should i?
logic in its finest
OH GOD PAJAMAS ARE SUCH A HARD CONCEPT RIGHT NOW
this is not okay. even my mom refers to me as a sorostitute.
Honey, I don't care how "classic you" this is. It's not gonna matter if we can't find you in the morning.
You grabbed her hand and started jacking her finger off. She was horrified.
Did it finish?
I world jack off literally anyone now that I'm not related to.
Jail is not for me. They portion control your meals and I don't really like that.
I was able to hide the fact that I had just shit in my pants, and then wupped her ass at FIFA
UPDATE: IM NOT A TEEN MOM LETS GO PARTY
"Like what guy would respond to 'let's fuck. I've got bagels'??"
I refuse to plan drunken casual sex. Just think of the monster I'd create.
Btw I appreciate you as a friend for taking the time to validate my sluttiness
Randomize
