It's like a parade of train wrecks.
i keep myself tagged when other girls look bad/ugly so i look better
Just ate lunch with a paperclip again. Seriously, need to invest in plastic forks.
finally cleaned my dorm for the first time all year. bleach is awesome.
No, listening to the fray and drinking a bottle of jack daniels does not count as counseling
Like, she can be the shepard of the gays. Delivering him unto homosexuality.
Last night was good. Things got bad when I found a sledge hammer.
I'm gonna eat more dunkaroos to cope with what's in my vagina.
In other news, I just sent her a video of me masturbating while driving in the rain, so I guess you could say I've mastered Snapchat
he was spending his time trying to use emojis to court a 19 year old, I can’t really take that seriously no matter how hot a dude is
Tomorrow is my bachelor party. If I die tomorrow, please know I graded you a "check" as a sister. "Check-minus" when you got mouthy.
They kept freaking out that you were missing and potentially having sex.. like it was a bad thing. Got fed up with hearing it so i just yelled "ITS HER BIRTHDAY AND SHE CAN FUCK IF SHE WANTS TO!" They gave me unnecessary looks. I thought it was acceptable.
I just got out of the shower and I feel like I just washed off 10 lbs of bad decisions...
Never. No amount of alcohol could convince my brain and eye sight that it is okay to fuck him. I'd rather fuck my cousin.
Hi I love you will you be up for a while!
That exclamation point was a drunk decision
Randomize
