i miss you so much
i miss you too
oops, did i send that to you? i meant to send it to the money you owe me
My morning has consisted of lying in a fetal position, eating a whole tub of ben and jerry's, talking to my cat, and setting all of our pictures on fire. Does that answer your question?
Is it bad that now when i read ingredients in the food I eat i only read it as shrooms instead of mushrooms ?
boy from dating site added me on facebook. i don't know if i'm ready for him to see what a drunk i am.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She was trying to fuck the exchange student from France. His English is really bad and the music was loud so she just pointed to a beer bottle and then her vagina.
Gotcha. Well, I'm puking and trying to keep down water from a mug that says "love the moment" around the rim. Not loving this particular moment.
You don't seem to appreciate the rareness of his junk.
Send me a picture. I'm more of a visual learner.
No one will ever find true happiness until they have gotten stoned and taken off the bra they've been wearing all day.
You, my dear friend, are a poet of the deep mental longings of women worldwide.
Shroomed with my best friend'a dad at his wife's surprise birthday party so you can say I have experience in the field
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
For an hr, you were convinced you no longer had a right arm so you played Super Mario Bros with just your left hand vs Beth. You won btw, mite b why she refused to wear the unicorn head
My one regret (beside the inevitable shit storm that followed) is that now I can't fuck his cute friend.
If I could go one week without being called a maneater or a spanish trolip that would be great.
Girl i am always here for you. But i am going to have sex now so im going to call you in the morning.
After passing out at the kitchen table, you woke up in my parents bed in between them. With no pants on.
They should invent shampoo and conditioner for sex hair. I would buy all the travel size ones.
Randomize